A Countercultural Christmas

Originally written November 29, 2022

This is the time of year when joy is seemingly felt more tangibly. People tend to be less grouchy, there are more kind gestures, and I get cut-off less on Market Street. Additionally, I start decorating for Christmas in early November because I love the Christmas season so much. The lights, the displays, the musky smell of pine needles balanced by the sweetness of peppermint. But the longer I live this Christian life, the more I see the secular view of Christmas seep into my way of thinking about Christmas, and ultimately about God. It’s a dangerous world that appeals to my disordered, sinful desires of beauty, greed, and discontentment. There is an enemy who delights in our demise as believers. If it is affecting me – a grown woman who would say, “I rejoice that I have complete confidence in you” (2 Cor 7:16) – then how do you think it is affecting our children, many of whom are unsaved and lost in a sea of confusion about identity?

My ultimate desire is for my children to one day commit their lives to following Jesus. However, I know that their salvation isn’t up to my husband or I. Our faithfulness does not equate to their submission – what a relief that is! But we are charged as parents to “train our children up in the way they should go” (Proverbs 22:6). Furthermore, there are pressures we face as parents to conform to the world, especially this time of year. We are constantly challenged to buy them all the toys and things that make them happy. We are one-upping each other to make Santa a huge deal. We let the Elf on the Shelf manage our children’s behavior. Do we do these things with ill-intent? No. These traditions begin as seemingly “innocent” and “magical.” I mean, my parents did this stuff for me and I turned out okay. But, I’ve spent years evaluating the “innocent traditions” and realized that as a child, they altered my taste buds to crave the world and reject holiness. So, my challenge for parents is to consider what Christmas “traditions” you have and evaluate if they bring God the glory he rightfully deserves.

Marketing and advertising are intended to breed discontentment in us. When children see a toy on TV or on a show they love to watch, what is the first thing they mutter? “I want that.” Discontentment doesn’t have to be taught. There is a reason the Israelites were commanded to “not covet.” God knew it was something they would struggle with and it is still a struggle today. How many presents do your children receive at Christmas? Do they understand the purpose behind every gift? Do they understand the financial sacrifice that was made to provide them each beautifully wrapped present? Do your children know the difference between a need and a want?

It took me years to recognize that Jesus will never beat Santa during this season. Santa brings the tangible gifts, Jesus brings the eternal. Santa can be seen and sat on, Jesus is physically unseen. Is it wrong to “do Santa?” In a nutshell, I would say no. The history of Saint Nicolas is beautiful. However, I would warn you that if Santa is beating Jesus, you’re doing Santa wrong in your household and down the road your children will be confused on the real reason we celebrate Christmas.

The Elf on the Shelf craze started about a decade ago and many fellow parents (whom I love dearly) countdown to Christmas in this way. If you do this in your family, are you prepared to not give your children gifts if they misbehave? How much time do you spend planning elaborate displays of the elf only to complain about it two weeks into the season? Do you post them on social media for likes? How does this mysterious elf get to the heart of your children? The answer is: he doesn’t. The elf is a guise to manipulate your children’s behavior, but never addresses behavior being driven from the heart. Scripture tells us “the heart is deceitful above all things” (Jer 17:9).

I write this as a concerned, fellow parent. My children come home from school daily sharing ways their friends are different from them or asking why they can’t have or do certain things. It is vital that as early as they can understand that we are upfront about our calling as those who love God. We are not called to lives of comfort. We are not called to look like those around us. We are called to look like Jesus. The world is coming for your children and it won’t stop. I write this not coming from a place of judgment, but as a parent waist deep in the trenches alongside you. I pray that each parent who follows our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ would take a moment of reflection and assess what Christmas looks like in your household. Do your kids understand the why? Do your kids understand the gravity of God sending his Son to be born as a sacrifice for us? Unwrap that gift of truth for your children and see how God blesses your obedience.